May. 19th, 2009

evilkate: (Default)
Well. My mum made an effort - small but probably not for her. For her it was possibly moon-walking :)

When she came over last week (See "When Love is Not Enough" post, previous by a few to this one) she had a present for me but no card. She had left it at home and she insisted I had to have them together. I was fine with that as I know the cards are important to her, because she makes them herself. So she said she would mail it all when she got home.

Today (or 'technically' yesterday) it arrived. A Simple envelope addressed with the name as a letter 'K' followed by my surname. The 'K' is written a little shaky and appears to be penned over a letter 'M' (the initial of my old name). Furthermore, the 'M' is not very solid, as though she started out of habit and stopped. It may not even be that letter - it could just be her trying to get the 'K' right ... under a little pressure.

So yeah ... it was good.

Better was the message in the card, which comes close to 'getting it' - well pretty much does ... with a small disclaimer I'll add at the end.

It said : "Birthdays are a day for reflection ... to celebrate who you are and who you will become."

The last word was on it's own line. Made me weepy. She also rang in the evening, to see if it had arrived and, if so, to check that I understood the message. Hey, it's not like I have an Uber-IQ now - I 'could have' missed it :D

Okay - sarcasm over (just a front to stop the weepies anyway)

So it was/is all good. A step. It doesn't completely make up for the pronoun and name issues on the Thursday ... but it's definitely a good thing.

And the disclaimer? - that she is still thinking in binary. Perhaps that's why she is stuck in the pronouns and old name thing - because until I have finished the transition ... I haven't moved to the other side of the binary. She is from an older world, so the disclaimer, while real, is not a biggie. I can mostly deal with that.

Though, after a suitable delay, I might explain how the name/pronoun thing cuts and why.

Anyway - so yeah - I don't know if this means XMas is on again. I haven't decided yet. I do know that, even if I avoid the siblings for a while, I think I'll work more to find ways of seeing mum.

She isn't there yet ... but, for her, she took a freakin' huge step today (technically yesterday) :D

Kate Out


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